I ran into this somewhere online and of course, I saved it. Cause it makes me grin.
I can imagine Arnold's Conan hewing his way through orcs with lots of Schwarzeneggery vocal effects. "Nnngggraahhh! Awhhooghh! I kill you all! Get to the Choppah!" Maybe not the last one.
Truthfully though, I'd really like a fantasy movie with the scale and heroic theme of the LOTRs movies, and the gritty, joyous hack and slashery of the first Arnold Conan movie. Lets not talk about the second one.
I have a bad feeling about the oncoming Conan movie with Jason Momoa from Stargate Atlantis. I don't doubt Momoa is gonna give it his all, and from the pics of him I've seen in the role, he's looking the part, mostly.
It's just that the hollywood braintrust has done their usual hatchet job on Howard's work. Made up their own characters, pasted on the standard "seeks revenge" plot, and altered Conan to make the non-Howardian elements fit.
I just don't see why all of Howards Conan stories couldn't be treated in the same way they did Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes stories in that Jeremy Brett series. Or the Brother Cadfael stories, or the Hercule Poirot stories.
All most all the Conan work is short stories anyway. Why not a faithful run of one hour episodes?